This week I will tell the tale of celebrity, heartbreak, fandom, and absolute stupidity.
Now before I begin this tale, I will highlight the fact that I have changed the name of the locations and people in this story for reasons which will become obvious soon.
But let’s begin.
So the story takes place outside a fake club in Vancouver where they were having a Drake night. What is Drake night you might ask? Well, basically a night where all they play is Drake. Incredible I know. Rather unsurprisingly the line for this club was massive, or as Trump would say ‘Huuuuge’. So I do what I do best and decide to spark up a conversation with people in this line. One thing to note about this story is that the Pushta T diss track had just come out and Drake was yet to respond. Link to that track here.
Now because of the size of the line I start jokingly question if it’s even worth waiting in line. Of course I decide to say something along the lines of ‘fuck Drake man, this isn’t even worth it after Pushta T dropped that diss track’. Now one of the people in line named ‘Jacob’ decided he was bestowed with the duty of protecting Drake’s honor. Now I genuinely believed he was joking because why else would someone get super agitated about Drake’s career being called dead by a nobody. But anyway, he goes on about Drake’s career and how he is an established rapper who put Toronto on the map. So instead of reading the social situation and recognizing that this man might have taken offense, decide to talk about the diss track and how Drake uses a ghostwriter. We go back and forth and finally I decide to accept that I’m an idiot who is just fucking around with no real intention and go back to vibing with the crowd.
But looking back, it got me thinking. Why do we partake in celebrity culture and feel the need to defend them so much? I’m guilty of it too. When the Machine Gun Kelly (MGK) diss track was dropped on Eminem I thought wow MGK is done for and Eminem is so much more talented than him, and that he shouldn’t even respond to him. First of all, it was a great diss track and MGK has been making some really good music since then. I just don’t know why we feel this compulsion to defend people who have no idea we exist. Taking the analogy further, there was a great Bollywood movie called ‘Oh My God’ where the protagonist makes a great point about people who feel the need to murder over religious views. He said something along the lines of ‘if your God is so great and powerful, why has he made you, this week and fimble man become the protector of his honor? He doesn’t need you to protect his honor”. I thought it was a pretty neat analogy to explain celebrity fandom.
Which is hypocritical of me because at least a celebrity is human and I’m guilty of defending the honor of cars and airlines. Like I’ve had debates about why the Suzuki Jimney is actually a great car compared to the G-Wagen on a price to performance ratio. There’s really no need for me to defend a tiny Japanese car yet here I am.
So yeah I don’t really know what the point of that whole story was but I just thought it was pretty interesting.